8. 8. 8
8. That’s the number. How many times at this point Kari, my wife has tried to get pregnant. We have been cumulatively trying for 13 months now; we took a few months break at a point for some cocktails and sanity. Not getting pregnant is heart breaking and difficult. It’s unfair! Kari swears it is the hardest thing she has and ever will go through. In upcoming blog posts I will talk more about our trying times, however, so I don’t end up posting a blovel (blog novel of course…) I’ll stay focused.
I remember when I was younger my friends would find it amusing that I would pick out a bracelet, a pair of sunglasses, or a necklace and then purchase an outfit around an accessory. Keeping in mind this was in a time when I had money to spend freely on accessories and outfits. Now all additional income goes to our mortgage, our savings account and a Roth IRA… ah ADULTHOOD. Anyways, it was kind of my thing! Pick out a beautiful teal bracelet and follow it up with a full outfit that matched it. Truly backwards from the norm… yes I realized this and accepted it. I thought that phase had long passed, until recently when I looked around and thought about the number 8. Also known as one full eternity, it most certainly feels like an eternity at least! But I realized I had been secretly purchasing small accessories for my ultimate outfit, a BABY! **Please believe this is just a euphemism, a lighter look at the sad subject of unsuccessful baby making. I’m not buying a mini pooch so I can carry it around in a cute bag over here. I’m sarcastic and joking is a coping mechanism for me, so deal with it!**
Moving on… Let me show you some of the what I like to think of as the “I can’t wait to have the opportunity to become the perfect mommy’s montage”
How to make Animal shaped Cake Magazine Article
Pregnancy Books Galore
Charlie Brown Children’s Encyclopedia Collection
I’m not stopping here either, I LOVE Pinterest, without needing to say it, I sure do have a Baby Ideas Board. Let me go there!
Seriously… How adorable!
Almost perfect, just have to replace guy kissing girl with girl kissing girl 😉
I’m so excited to do this!!!
So above is just a smidge of my bracelets if you will!
Thinking about becoming a mother changes what my free mind time is spent contemplating, when I zone out while watching TV, when I’m driving, or when I’m pretending to listen to someone talk, I’m thinking about baby names, what our child will be like, look like, will we teach them great values? Will we have a precious beautiful baby girl who is the sweetest daintiest little thing, or will we have a giggling little boy that loves to make monster noises and believes he is the coolest super hero ever? An obsession consumes you, along with an eagerness, an almost adrenaline pumps through my body when I think of the endless nursery options or baking cupcakes for my babies first birthday, making mother’s day gifts for my wife, holding and cuddling my baby, the thought is euphoric!
I remember telling my hair stylist who is also a lesbian and happens to do the hair of many lesbians in my community, when Kari and I were planning on starting a family how we talked and discussed and weighed every issue possible. We were at a point where we were jointly ready, excited, ecstatic about beginning the process of expanding our family. My stylist had named a few other couples who were either pregnant or still trying to have a child and I stated “Well it should happen in about 3 months, 6 tops, but I can’t imagine it taking that long”. I think about that sentence often, I would currently pay double for life per hair appointment if I could retract that naive, foolish statement! 8 try’s, 13 months, I obviously had no clue what I was talking about! However I do know I have a jewelry box full of accessories yet nothing to wear…